As I write I have an on going under current that I fight “who cares, no one cares… You’re wasting your time. No one reads this…” I was going to explain or pick up from my last post but that started the echoing pain of feeling worthless and forgettable. Now this has all conflated to […]
How does one properly quit everything? If all your friendships are built around a brand that is useless and pointless do you quit your friends too? I’ve got some sort of meeting today and I don’t remember the time. More people asking me to prove how I’ve convinced myself that my laziness, my ineptitude and
A trembling spirit grasp at lightthe glimmers seemfading in the waves shadowsfamiliar specterstempting to drowntempting to seclude the spirit weepssoftlyunheardbeneath a smile As if desire could birthAs if joy could breatheAs if mutual warmth was sharedAs if there was anything to receive Night chillsHaunting shiversHaunting wishesHaunting dismissals tiny spiritYou are lovedIndeed feel the earthshe cries
This calendar year has been a roller-coaster, I feel like I keep saying that everywhere. The highs and lows have been unexpected and exhausting but I believe I feel a little bit of peace for now. Within minutes yesterday morning I went from trying to share my feelings of shame, confusion and grief to a
Trying to try… Even though it feels like there’s nothing I can even do anymore… I’m back to wanting to hide. I have felt perpetually hideous ever since my dealings with TAM so tech issues on my bday pushing my images to my Mastodon have made me uneasy for days, I woke up the next
