Even though it feels like there’s nothing I can even do anymore…
I’m back to wanting to hide. I have felt perpetually hideous ever since my dealings with TAM so tech issues on my bday pushing my images to my Mastodon have made me uneasy for days, I woke up the next morning to see that all my joy from the kindness on my music stream were short lived.
I recently added Stripe to my Kofi as a payment option and it seemed to be a good call since people seemed more willing to help using Stripe but it’s holding my funds hostage since I’ve never used it before. At first it said I’d get a payout today the 13th, then on Thursday it said the 16th so that’s what I told my apartment complex. This morning (Saturday) it’s now saying the 18th. My apartment said if I don’t have the full amount in a money order by Tuesday (the day I told them) I’ll get processed for eviction anyway.
I’m very scared but I’m trying to fight against this pain. I just saw a post on Instagram discussing how we should talk when we feel shame.
Insert Record Scratch
As I was making this post the universe shifted some things and suddenly I’m back to safety. The whiplash I’m feeling is a lot… now I am not sure what to even say. More on this and everything after I let myself simmer.